Which Land is Your Land?

Land of the Has-Been

The land of the “Has-Been” is a place where all our memories reside. It is a land filled with many high mountains, deep canyons, turbulent and still waters, blue skies and terrible storms.

Land of the Should-Be

The land of the “Should-Be” is hazy and foggy filled with mirages that come and go. It is a land created out of wants, needs, expectations, anxieties and hopes. It can be a land of liberation or a land of imprisonment.

Land of the What-Is

The land of the “What-Is” unfolds with every blink of the eye, every breath we take and every sound we hear. It is a real place that is constantly influenced and created by our perceptions, feelings and actions.

For human beings the land of the “What-Is” is the most difficult place to live because it is constantly informed and often deformed by the lands of the “Has-Been,” and “Should-Be.”

Sometimes we can’t find our way out of the land of the “Has-Been” because we get stuck there with lost dreams, relationships, disappointments and painful memories. We may also get stuck there with wonderful memories we refuse to leave behind to face the more demanding or less happy land of “What-Is. The land of the “Has-Been” should not be ignored. It should be visited to help inform the choices and assumptions we make in the land of the “What-Is” It is the place we go, whether we like it or not, when we choose a mate, a career and how to relate to those in the land of the “What-Is.” It is a land to know and respect, but not a place to live.

The land of the “Should-Be” is often created out of our reaction to the land of the “Has-Been.” “I won’t raise my children like I was raised.” “When I get married it is going to be forever.” The land of the “Should-Be” is enormous, filled with our ideas, hopes and aspirations to make our lives happier and better. It is important that it is our land of the “Should-Be” and not someone else’s. It is a good land to visit and keep in our sights, but living there is a to be imprisoned in darkness that blinds us to the light that leads us to the land of the “What –Is.”

Living in the land of the “What-Is” demands a constant awareness and balancing of the lands of the “Has-Been” and “Should-Be.” The balance helps us to make the best decisions and see our world clearly in times of light and darkness. It is the only place we can be aware and truly alive. It is where happiness happens!